i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
