see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Randomize
