Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
How does it feel to date your dad?
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
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