I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Randomize
