how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
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