Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
