remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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