Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Randomize
