I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
While the bouncer was checking my purse, he found a bag of pasta noodles in it and asked me why I put them in my purse. I said to him: "So the guy knows I can cook."
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
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