i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Randomize
