the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm a complete klutz, especially when I get excited. I pee a lot too. I'm like a puppy except I don't pee in the floor.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize