i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Randomize
