just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
and you fell through a lawn chair
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
