I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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