Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
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