Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
