Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
