so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I got inside last night via doggy door
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
