ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
