like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize