I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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