Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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