We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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