theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
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