I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
