It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize