been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
