Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
alicia just called me and talked to me in "the eternal language of the dinosaurs" and then kind of roared and gurgled. what kind of 4th of july are you guys having?
the boozy kind. is there any other?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
