So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Randomize
