I'll bet she douches with gravy.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
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