Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
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