Please don't call me names while I'm carrying your child.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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