If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
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