Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
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