i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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