doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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