True story: Just left my solo cup on a cop car. Yesss
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize