he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
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