Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
Randomize
