I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
