there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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