bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Randomize
