My pussy is not your playground.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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