I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
But theres a keg here and me gusta
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
