I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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