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• (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I wish there were wingman of the year awards.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.

  (1-404): View more from Georgia

  Two?

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Two.

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• (612): View more from Minnesota

  Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.

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• 

  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (760): View more from California

  so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?

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• (516): View more from New York

  my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.

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• (818): View more from California

  Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.

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• (909): View more from California

  Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.

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• 

  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (561): View more from Florida

  I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.

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• (914): View more from New York

  So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.

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• (859): View more from Kentucky

  So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me

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• (585): View more from New York

  Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.

  (585): View more from New York

  How long will your dick be dry?

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.

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