just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
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