Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
I know her cup size but not her name....
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