would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
If you're ever desperate for a guy's #, ask him to call your lost cell phone so you can find it. Some genius used that on me last night. FML
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
couldn't remember his name. introduced him as 'mr multiple orgasms'
Randomize
