1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Randomize
